A FANTASY FULFILLED
Hutch finally comes to terms with Starsky’s confession. Now he has to do some soul searching of his own.
Slash, first time, committed relationship.
Beta read by ProvencePuss. This is a sequel to Forbidden Fantasy.
I closed the door to my apartment and locked it
behind me. I was exhausted, mentally and physically. I had known for months
that Starsky was hiding something from me but I never expected it to be
something like this. I could accept the fact that Starsky was bi-sexual. Hell,
I could even accept the fact that he had ‘fallen in love’ with me. But what I
was having a hard time dealing with was the fact that he had lied to me about
his sexuality ever since I had known him. Okay, I guess lied isn’t exactly
correct. He just didn’t tell me that he swung both ways.
What really troubled me about this whole mess was the
fact that he snuck away every few months when the urge got too strong and went
to dangerous places in other towns to satisfy his needs. This time he had
almost been killed when he was attacked by four men in an alley outside a gay
bar in Bristo. They came dangerously close to beating
him to death just because they didn’t like men who chose to have sex with other
men. If some customers leaving the bar hadn’t found him when they did and
called for help, he would have died in that dark, trash filled alley. I went to
the hospital immediately when my Captain called me with the news and stayed by
his side until he was out of danger and released to come back home with me to
Bay City.
Even after we got back I knew Starsky wasn’t telling me
everything but I let it slide. I knew my partner and I knew if I pushed him on
this he would just shut down and refuse to tell me anything. So I was willing
to wait until he was ready to talk about it. We just never got that change. I
left to run some errands a few days after we got back to
I walked back to the bedroom to check on him and paused with
my hand on the doorknob. I could hear soft grunts and whimpers coming from
behind the closed door. I eased open the door, thinking at first that Starsky
might be sick. I froze in my tracks, unable to look away, when I realized what
was really going on.
Starsky was so wrapped up in what he was doing that he
didn’t even realize I was there. Now, I’ve seen Starsky naked more times than I
can remember over the years and I’d even seen him with an erection a time or
two, but this was the first time I had ever seen him pleasuring himself. To be honest, it was the most erotic thing I’ve
ever seen.
I’d always known that
Starsky was a handsome man with a lean, muscular build. I didn’t know how he
managed to stay so fit considering the junk he ate every day. I had a pretty
good build too but I had to really work at it. I was disturbed to find my own cock
responding to the blatant display of raw sexuality unfolding in front of me. An
aroused Starsky just seemed to be screaming Fuck me, please fuck me.
I continued standing there even as I recognized the
subtle signals that he was rapidly approaching his climax. The last thing I
expected to hear was him screaming out my name in a strangled voice as he came.
When he opened his eyes and looked at me, I saw the sheer terror reflected in
his gaze and I bolted. I knew that I had uncovered a secret he had never meant
for me to find out. I heard him calling my name, begging me to wait, even as
the front door slammed shut behind me.
I ran down to my car and gunned the
engine, pulling away from the curb as fast as I could. I didn’t know where I
was going; I just had to get away from there, away from the images that were
burned into my mind. I drove around aimlessly for almost an hour as I tried to
make sense out of the scene I had just witnessed. What did it all mean? Did his
calling out my name like that mean anything or was it just a coincidence? I
found myself thinking back over the past few months and suddenly remembered all
the times I had caught Starsky looking at me with a strange expression in his
eyes that I couldn’t readily identify. An undefined hunger, a moment of
vulnerability, a yearning for something he didn’t or couldn’t have. I knew I
couldn’t just walk away from my best friend. I had to find out what was going
on in that head of his. I turned around and headed back to his place.
I let myself in and found him sitting on the sofa with
his face buried in his hands, looking like a lost little boy. He looked up when
I shut the door and stared at me, his eyes filled with so much pain and shame
that it almost ripped my heart out. I shook my head and raised my hand before
he could speak. I turned and went into the kitchen for a beer, draining it in
one long swallow. I immediately got another one, sipping it more slowly as I
tried to gather my scattered thoughts. Finally, I looked at him and said, my
voice a bit colder than I intended,
“So, Starsky…how long have you been using me as one of
your fantasies to jerk off to?” He bowed his head and didn’t answer me but not
before I saw the flash of pain in those sapphire eyes. I felt terrible. I
didn’t want to hurt him, I just wanted to understand
what was going on. I slammed my beer can down on the counter and growled, “Are you gonna talk
to me or not? I think you at least owe me some kind of explanation!” I took a
step towards him intending to shake the truth out of my stubborn mule-headed
partner if I had to.
Without raising his head, he said in a quiet, carefully
controlled voice, “What do you want me to say, Blondie? That you turn me on?
That I get hot just thinking about you? You want me to tell you how I think
about touching you all the time? About getting you into my bed and never
letting you leave?” His voice cracked on those last few words and he buried his
face in his hands again.
No, that wasn’t what I wanted to hear but at least it was
a step in the right direction. Starsky was finally being honest with me. I
stepped up to him and reached out to grasp his chin with my hand, raising his
head and forcing him to look into my eyes. I kept my voice calm and quiet so I
wouldn’t spook him. “Starsk, are you trying to tell me that you’re gay?” I
asked him as gently as I could.
“No…not gay.” He said
defensively. “I’m Bi. I like women too. I never wanted you to find out. I tried
to stay straight but sometimes the urge just got too strong to ignore…”
“Is that why you were in Bristo?”
I said, suddenly putting two and two together and feeling like a fool for not
figuring it out sooner “Were you at that gay bar? Does that have anything to do
with what happened to you?”
He nodded his head dejectedly, his eyes still filled with
fear, fear of rejection from me. I knew that whatever I said next would impact
our relationship significantly. I sighed heavily and settled down on the sofa
beside him. Slipping my arm around his shoulders, I was surprised to feel him
trembling. My tough streetwise partner was scared to death of how I was going
to react. Instinctively, I pulled him close and said,
“Okay.
Start at the beginning and tell me everything. I think I have the right to know
what’s going on in that empty head of yours lately, partner.”
I
listened to him as he told me how he had discovered he was bi-sexual while he
was still in high school and how he had his first sexual experience with a man
while he was in Viet Nam. I was shocked when he told me that he’d always been attracted
to but had always been able to control those urges until the last few months
when he realized his feelings towards me were changing, he was falling ‘in
love’ with me and that scared him to death. He was crying by the time he
finished his story and I was pretty close to losing it myself. I pulled him
closer and just held on tight until he regained his composure. He finally
raised his head and looked at me, desperately seeking my acceptance and
reassurance that nothing between us had changed because of his confession.
Choosing my words with care, I said,
“I wish you’d told me all of this before. It
could have saved us both a lot of trouble. Don’t you know that you’re the most
important thing in my life? I couldn’t make it without you, mushbrain.
I love you too. I just need some time to get used to all of this and to figure
out how I feel about it.”
“So
you don’t hate me?” he asked in a lost sounding voice, still refusing to
believe that I could accept the situation so easily.
“I
could never hate you, buddy. No matter what.” I told
him with a comforting squeeze. I hesitated before continuing. I didn’t want to
hurt him but I didn’t want to give him any false hope either. “I won’t lie to
you. I’ve wondered sometimes what it would be like to be with another man but I
never acted on those feelings. I never had any reason to.” I paused and then
added without a second thought. “Until now.”
I
couldn’t miss the sudden surge of hope in his eyes when I said that. Gently, I
cupped my hand to his cheek, cradling his face in the palm of my hand. “No promises, buddy.” I said quietly but firmly. I didn’t want
there to be any misunderstandings between us. “But if I could do that with
another man, it would be with you. Just give me some time to get my head around
this. Okay?”
He
nodded and we both chuckled as his stomach growled loudly. Leave to my
partner’s stomach to decide it was time to be fed. I suggested ordering a pizza
and told him to take a shower while I called in the order. We didn’t talk about
what had happened when he came back out. We didn’t have to. Everything was up
to me now. Starsky wouldn’t push me or try to force me into making any decision
I didn’t feel comfortable with. If I decided to remain nothing more than the
best of friends, he would accept that and never bring the subject up again.
That was my partner. Loyal to a fault, always putting me and
my feelings first before his own.
After
we had eaten, I told Starsky I was going home. I could tell he was disappointed
but he understood. I needed to be alone to think about his confession. He was
still sore and stiff from the beating he had taken but he would be okay on his
own. I knew he wouldn’t hesitate to call
me if he needed me for anything. I grabbed a beer out of my refrigerator and
slumped down on the sofa. I knew I shouldn’t be drinking anymore than I already
had since I had to work the next day but suddenly getting loaded didn’t seem
like such a bad idea.
I
had always prided myself on being more liberal minded and accepting of
‘alternative lifestyles’ than some of my peers. I’d know several homosexual
couples during my college years, both male and female partners, and they had
all been in happy, committed relationships. They hadn’t been any different from
the rest of us except for the fact that they were both same sex. I’d had my
fair share of propositions over the years but I’d had never considered any of
them seriously. But I knew that I cared too much about Starsky to take his
feelings lightly or to disregard the things he had told me. It had taken a lot
of courage for him to confess his feelings to me. I didn’t know if I would have
had enough guts to do that. But then Starsky had always had more courage than
anyone I knew.
I
had watched him get hurt time and time again by the women he had dated over the
years but he kept trying, reaching for that brass ring or that pot of gold at
the end of the rainbow. He didn’t give his heart to just anyone but when he
did, he gave it completely. His only serious relationships had been with women
not men. So I could only imagine how much it must have scared him when he
realized he wanted more from me than what we already had. Not only were his
feelings for me changing but his secret was in danger of being exposed to the
one person he didn’t want to find out. Me. If I had been in his position, I had
no idea what I would have done or how I would have reacted.
I
let my mind drift. Could I do it? Could I
let myself love Starsky the way he wanted me to? I craved his touch just as
much as he craved mine but what would it feel like to have him touching me like
that? I’d seen Starsky with his women enough times to know that he was
considerate and passionate lover. We had even dated the same woman a few times
and they had always raved about Starsky’s talents in the bedroom. It was the
only part of our lives that still remained separate, the only thing we had
never shared completely with each other. Hell, to be honest, the only thing we
got from our women that we couldn’t or didn’t get from each other was the sex.
In every other aspect, we met each other’s needs except for that one little
thing. More than one woman had recognized that and dumped us because of it.
We’d
already shared the same bed more than once when one of us was hurt or sick. I
always woke up with an armful of Starsky. Somehow during the night, he always
managed to end up cuddled up next to me. I’d never even given it a second
thought, Starsky was just naturally a cuddler when he
was asleep. Would it really be such a big step to cross that final forbidden boundary
that loomed between us? Somehow, I didn’t think so.
At least it seemed as if I had resolved one issue in
my mind. I had no qualms about having sex with another man especially if that
man was Starsky. So that just left one thing to resolve. How did I really feel
about Starsky? I knew that I loved him but was I ‘in love’ with him? Was it
really that different when it came to love? I would gladly give my life for
him. How could I say that I wouldn’t let him make love to me if that was what
he really wanted? And as close as we already were wouldn’t a sexual
relationship just deepen what was already there?
I smirked as I thought about all the failed relationships
in my past including my marriage. I knew that I had deliberately sabotaged a
few of them when they got too possessive and demanded that I spend more of my
time with them than I did with Starsky. There had never been any question of
who I would choose if they forced me too and they all found that out in a
hurry. So, what did that say about me and Starsky? I knew that he had done the
same thing himself a few times. The only two women who had ever come close to
even fitting into our private little world and who had loved us for who we were
with all our quirks and bad habits, accepting our unique bond without any
reservations, had both been murdered simply for loving us. We had been there
for each other to pick up the pieces and go on with our lives, cherishing their
memories and holding them in our hearts. But women like Gillian and Terry only
come along once in a lifetime and that’s only if you’re very very lucky.
I thought about all the times I had ever been in love. That
aching need to be with them as much as possible,
missing them the minute they walked out the door, calling them just to hear the
sound of their voice. That feeling of being lost and alone
when I had to be separated from them for any length of time, as if I were
missing a part of myself. With a sudden start I realized that was
exactly how I felt about Starsky most of the time. Like a lightening bolt going
off in my head I realized that I was ‘in love’ with him too. I had just never
let myself admit it before. For a moment, I was too stunned to move but then I
bounced to my feet and grabbed my car keys. I had to talk to Starsky and I had
to talk to him right now before it was too late.
I drove through the early morning streets like a madman,
focused only on getting back to my partner’s apartment as quickly as possible.
As I pulled up in front of his building, I noticed immediately that his car was
missing. I scrambled up the front steps and used my key to open the door. I
knew as soon as I stepped inside that Starsky wasn’t there. A quick check of
the bathroom and his bedroom revealed that his shaving kit and an old duffle
bag were both missing, along with several of his faded jeans and some of his
favorite shirts DAMN IT, STARSKY! WHERE
THE HELL DID YOU GO? I knew that he wasn’t in any condition to be traveling
very far but in his present state of mind I had no idea what he was liable to
do. As I started to leave, I noticed an envelope lying on the kitchen table
with my name scratched across the front in my partner’s familiar left handed
scrawl.
Grabbing it, I tore it open and pulled out the single
sheet of paper I found inside. I held my breath as I read:
Hutch,
I know I laid some pretty heavy stuff on you
tonight. I should have been honest with you from the start. I know you need
some time to think about everything and it would probably be easier for both of
us if I wasn’t around. So I’m going to
Love S.
“Damn it, Starsky!” I muttered as I finished reading his
note. I stuffed the letter in my pocket and tried to think about what to do next.
I knew that Starsky was emotionally vulnerable right now. I picked up the phone
and called Captain Dobey at home.
“Hello?” he growled in my ear, answering the phone on the
second ring.
“Captain, its Hutch. I don’t have time to explain but
Starsky took off and went to
“What the hell is going on with you two?” Dobey barked in
an irritated voice. “You two are worse than Cal and Rosie!” After a few more
choice words, his voice softened and he said, “How much time do you need to
work out whatever is going on between you and your bullheaded partner?”
“I don’t know. Hopefully not more than
a week. If it’s going to take any longer than that then I’ll let you
know.” I said gratefully. In spite of his brash exterior, underneath it all
Captain Dobey really cared about us and we both knew that.
“All right. Call me when you
know more.” He said, hanging up without another word. My next call was to the
airlines to get a seat on the next available flight to
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My flight landed on time and I grabbed a cab at the
airport. The driver didn’t seem to happy when I gave him Rachel Starsky’s
Brooklyn address but a generous tip convinced him that it was worth his while
to make the trip. Forty-five minutes later, he was pulling up in front of the
tiny two bedroom house where Starsky had spent his childhood. On our last visit
together, Starsky had told me how much the neighborhood had gone downhill since
he was a kid. What had once been a nice middle class neighborhood full of
families with small children had been taken over by gang members, hookers and
junkies. But Rachel Starsky refused to move from the house she had lived in for
almost forty-five years. I knew that Starsky sent her money out of each
paycheck to help her with the upkeep and expenses. Although Starsky’s younger
brother, Nicky, still lived at home, he was about useless when it came to
helping his mother out with the bills.
In spite of the forced
separation when he was a rebellious thirteen year old, Starsky and his mother
were still close. Since I was estranged from my own family and had been for
years, I really envied the relationship that Starsky shared with his mother and
the rest of his extended family.
From the day we met when Starsky graduated from the
I grabbed my bag and walked up the front stoop. The front
door opened before I got a chance to knock and I found myself wrapped in Rachel
Starsky’s warm embrace. I laughed as she stepped back and looked at me
intently.
“David never said you were coming too.” She scolded me
gently. “He’s still sleeping. He was exhausted when he got here.”
“He…uh…doesn’t know I’m here.” I stammered, silently
curing the stutter I got whenever I was nervous or upset. Now that I was here,
I hoped Starsky that wouldn’t be too mad about my following him across the
country to his mother’s house. It was the first time I had arrived uninvited
and unannounced but I didn’t want to give him a chance to run again before I
could talk to him.
“Did the two of you have a fight?” Rachel asked with the
insight as her son. “David was upset when he arrived but he wouldn’t talk to me
about it.”
“No…we didn’t have a fight. Not exactly…just a little
misunderstanding.” I reassured her. I didn’t want to worry her and I had no
idea if she knew that Starsky was bi-sexual. Even if she did, it wasn’t my
place to talk about something so personal with Rachel. This was between me and
Starsky.
“You must be hungry. Come in the kitchen and I’ll make
you some breakfast and some coffee.”
I knew better than to protest. Rachel Starsky was a
typical Jewish mother, using food as a way to express both comfort and love. I
followed her into the sunny, cheerful kitchen and sat down at the kitchen
table. Within minutes she was sitting a plateful of scrambled eggs, hash browns
and lightly buttered toast in front of me along with a steaming cup of black
coffee. I dug in with barely concealed pleasure. Rachel was an excellent cook who
always complained that Starsky and I were both too skinny to suit her.
Rachel poured herself a cup of coffee and sat down across
from me. In her usual direct way, another trait that Starsky seemed to have
inherited from her, she said,
“I’m glad you’re here. David’s always so sad when you
can’t come with him.” She smiled as she reached out and rubbed the back of my
hand. “This will be a nice surprise for him when he wakes up.”
“I hope so.” I said trying to keep the doubt out of my
voice.
“Whatever is wrong, I know the two of you will work it
out.” She said confidently. “You love each other too much not to.”
I raised my head to look into those blue eyes that looked
so much like her sons. Although Starsky was the spitting image of his deceased
father, he had his mother’s eyes and mouth. I found myself wondering if she
knew something that I didn’t know or was it just her mother’s instinct wanting
to see her child happy?
Before I could think of an answer, I heard a startled
sound behind me and turned my head to see Starsky standing in the doorway. He
was staring at me as if he had seen a ghost. “What are you doing here, Blintz?”
he said in a stunned voice.
“Looking for you.” I told him
“You left before we had a chance to finish talking.”
“I think I’ll leave you two boys alone.” Rachel said
diplomatically, rising gracefully to her feet. “I have some errands to run with
Mrs. Ellis down the street. I should be back in a few hours.” She smiled at her
son fondly and reached out to run her fingers through his tousled curls. “Take
good care of Ken while I’m gone. He’s come a long way after you. Listen to what
he has to say.” With those parting words, she was gone, the back door closing
quietly behind her.
I exchanged a shy smile with Starsky as he moved to the
stove to fix himself a plate of food. An uneasy silence hung in the air between
us until he was finished. He sat down in the chair his mother had vacated and
began eating with his usual gusto. I took a deep breath and decided to start
first.
“Why did you take off like that?” I asked.
“Seemed like a good idea at the time.” He said with a
shrug of his shoulders, concentrating on his plate instead of looking me in the
eyes, a sure sign that he wasn’t comfortable.
“I came back to talk to you and you were gone. You must
have taken off just after I left.”
“I did.” He said. He finally looked up, his eyes filled
with a deep sadness that made me want to reach out and pull him into my arms. Starsky
sighed heavily and took a deep breath. “Look, Hutch…I don’t expect you to feel
the same way I do. It’s just a relief not to have to lie about it anymore.”
“Starsky, you idiot,” I scolded him gently. “I came back
to tell you that I think I feel the same way you do and that I want to see
where things go from here.”
“You think you feel the same way I do?” he repeated as if
he hadn’t heard me right. “Hutch, do you have any idea what you’re saying?”
“Oh, I think I’ve got a pretty good idea.” I said with a
chuckle. “And I’m sure you can help fill in the blanks for me.” I grinned at
the blush that crept up into Starsky’s face. It wasn’t often that I could get
the best of my partner. Feeling bold, I reached out and grabbed his hand. “I
love you, David Michael Starsky and I want to find out what it feels like to
make love to you.”
“Jeeze, Hutch…” he said in an embarrassed tone. “You don’t mess around once you make your
mind up, do ya?”
“Hey, the way I figure it, you and I have wasted enough
time as it is. We got a lot of making up to do.”
“Not in my mother’s house, I hope.” He said in a teasing
voice, his eyes shining with joy.
“I don’t think that would be such a good idea, do you?” I
said with a soft laugh. “But I did get us at least a week off, maybe a little
longer if we play our cards right. What do you say we spend that time getting
to know each other?”
“I’d like that…” he said with a shy smile. “As long as
you’re sure this is what you really want and you’re not just saying it because
you know its what I want.”
“God, mushbrain…give me some
credit here, would ya? I’m offering you something I’ve never offered any other
man. Don’t make me feel like I’m making some big sacrifice here.”
“You have no idea how precious what you’re offering is or
how much I’ll treasure it.” He said with the sweetest smile I had ever seen on
his lips.
“I have a feeling that neither one of us is going to be
disappointed.” I told him quietly. “We’ve always loved each other,
we’re just going to learn a new way to express that love.”
“I need to know where you want this to go, Blondie.”
Starsky said, a hint of doubt creeping into his voice. “Because
if we do this…I’m in it for keeps. If you can’t deal with that than it’s
not too late to change your mind.”
“Gee, Starsky…are you asking me to go steady with you?” I
teased him, loving the way his cheeks flushed again. “Or are you asking me to
marry you?”
“I’d ask you to marry me if I could.” He admitted
self-consciously. “But I can’t…so I’m asking you if you’re willing to spend the
rest of your life with me instead.”
“Sounds like a proposal to me.” I said, my voice turning
serious as I looked deeply into his eyes. “For better or for worse, until death
do us part and all that jazz.”
“And I didn’t even buy you a ring.” He quipped. He
grinned mischievously as he added “Yet.” It was his turn to turn serious.
“Hutch, I know you’ve never been with a guy before so we’ll take it as slow as
you want. I don’t want to rush you into anything you’re not ready for.”
“Don’t worry about me.” I reassured my anxious partner. “I’m
a big boy and I catch on quick.” I couldn’t resist another teasing remark just
to see if I could make him blush again. “So, how soon can we start with my
‘love lessons’?”
Starsky reared back his head and laughed. God, I loved to
hear that laugh. Everything would be perfect if I could just hear him laugh
like that every day for the rest of my life. He laughed so hard that his eyes
began to tear up. I couldn’t help joining in and soon we were both laughing
uncontrollably. Finally, we managed to regain some semblance of sanity. We
cleared the table and washed up the dishes. I felt a shiver run down my spine
every time our hands brushed accidentally or we bumped up against each other.
From the flushed look on his face, I could tell that Starsky felt it too. There
was suddenly a sexual tension between us that had never been there before.
I was startled when Starsky suddenly shoved me back
against the counter and pressed his body up against me, rubbing against me
suggestively as he ran his hands up and down my arms. I gasped at the lust I
saw burning in his eyes. I’d seen that look before but it was usually directed
at a woman, not at me. It was a bit unnerving to say the least. He leaned
closer and I knew that he was going to kiss me.
Then I felt his mouth on mine. His lips were softer than
I had expected and more demanding than any woman I had ever kissed. When he ran
his tongue against my bottom lip, I willingly opened my mouth to him. Our
tongues teased and explored, discovering each others own unique taste and
flavor. The temperature in the room seemed to go up at least ten degrees as we
shared our first kiss. We were both breathing heavily when we finally came up
for air.
“Wow…” I whispered in an awed voice. “I was wrong when I
said you weren’t a good kisser.”
“You’re not so bad yourself, Blondie.” He said with the
dirtiest chuckle I’d ever heard him use. “But I think we’d better cool it
before things get out of hand. I’d sure hate for Ma to come home and catch us
in a compromising position.”
“What do you say we make some kind of excuse to your mom
when she gets back and check into a motel so I can have you all to myself for
the next few days?.” I suggested with a leer.
“Sounds pretty good to me. I
mean, Ma knows I swing both ways and she tries to understand that but she
doesn’t know about us yet.”
“I don’t know about that.” I said thinking back to my
aborted conversation with Rachel earlier. “I think she might suspect
something.”
“Well, I don’t care if she does…I’m not ready to share
you yet…especially with my mother.” Starsky said. He leaned in for another
deep, lingering kiss that shook me to my very core. He was right, we needed to
cool it until we could make our excuses to Rachel and find a nice quiet motel
to shack up in. Then I intended to show my personal little devil a few little
tricks of my own.
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Rachel graciously accepted our lame excuses for
staying at a motel during our visit and by
No sooner had I closed the door behind us and locked it, then we were wrapped in each other’s arms. We kissed almost
desperately as our hands tugged at each other’s clothing, needed to feel skin
on skin. Our shirts fell to the floor, all the buttons ripped off of mine in
our haste to get undressed. Starsky moaned softly as he ran his hands over my
nearly hairless chest, tracing the outline of bone and muscle almost reverently.
It was my turn to moan when he began playing with my nipples. That was one area
that had never been especially sensitive before now. But under Starsky’s
talented hands, they suddenly became another erotic zone. I almost lost it
completely when his mouth settled over one nipple, nipping lightly and then
licking gently to ease the sting.
“Jesus, Starsky…” I whimpered as I dug my fingers into
his shoulders to steady myself. “What the hell are you doing to me?”
“Gonna love you real good, babe.” He whispered, his words slightly muffled since his mouth was still busy
teasing my nipple. “Gonna make you forget every other lover you ever had but
me.”
“You keep that up and it won’t take much…” I whispered,
wrapping my fingers in his soft thick curls. I had always loved Starsky’s hair.
It was so thick and soft. It felt like strands of silk slipping through my
fingers. My own hair was rapidly thinning as I grew older. I’d probably be bald
by the time I was sixty while Starsky would still have a head full of hair.
Just when I thought I couldn’t stand it anymore, Starsky moved his mouth to my
other nipple, giving it equal attention.
My cock felt hard as a rock, straining painfully against
the fabric of my jeans. The front of my briefs were
already soaked with pre-cum. I had never been more turned on in my life. If
Starsky kept this up, I was going to come before he even got close to my cock.
Somehow, Starsky seemed to know how close I was to the edge and he backed off.
Taking a step back, he smiled wickedly as he reached for
his belt. I reached out and stopped him. “Let me.” I whispered almost
desperately. He nodded slightly and moved his hand letting me unfasten his belt
and whip it out of the belt loops. My hands were trembling slightly as I
unsnapped his jeans and slowly pulled down the zipper, exposing the impressive bulge
in his black bikini briefs. Hooking my fingers in the waistband of his jeans
and his underwear at the same time, I slowly pushed the clothes down over his
slender hips, tugging gently at the skintight denim. As the jeans and briefs
slid down to his knees, Starsky gave a little wiggle and let them fall to his
ankles, kicking them aside.
“My turn.” He whispered hoarsely, his eyes burning hotly.
He stripped me of my cords just as slowly, his hungry eyes devouring the sight
of my cock as it sprang free from my clothing. “Beautiful…” he said “Just
beautiful.”
I couldn’t help laughing. It sounded strange hearing my
very male, very macho partner calling my cock beautiful. Although we were both
what the jocks used to call ‘hung well’, my cock was a bit longer and thicker
than Starsky’s and I was uncircumcised while he was neatly cut. He grabbed my
hips and pulled our lower bodies together, both of us hissing at the first
tantalizing touch of our cocks rubbing against each other. Kissing each other
again, he backed up, pulling us back onto the bed with him lying on the bottom.
Instinctively, I bucked my hips, thrusting my cock against his upper thigh. My
cock throbbed, begging for release and I knew that Starsky had to be just as
close as I was to the edge. I was leaking badly and needed to come.
But Starsky seemed to have other ideas. He flipped me to
the side, reversing our positions so that I was the one lying on my back on the
bed. Leaning over me, he grinned and whispered, “I ain’t
done with you yet, Blondie so stop trying to rush things. We have all night.”
“God, Starsky…I need to come now! I can’t wait all
night!” I growled through tightly clenched teeth.
“Patience, lover…I
want a little taste first.” He said as he leaned down and ran his tongue over
the head of my cock, lapping up all the traces of pre-cum he found there.
“Oh, Christ!” I screamed, arching my back and thrusting my hips as my cock seemed to
seek out that warm wet tongue again. I was slowly losing my mind and loving
every minute of it. I had never expected anything like this or we’d have been
making love to each other a long time ago. Because I knew in my heart that this
was what making love was all about instead of just having sex with some one
night stand. I knew that everything was more intense because it was me and
Starsky making love. It would never have been this good with anyone else. I
gasped as I felt Starsky taking me into his mouth and I lost it completely. I
heard myself screaming his name as my body exploded into a million pieces and
my muscles trembled with the intensity of my orgasm. I felt Starsky swallowing
all I had to give; milking my cock until it was dry, then licking me clean.
I collapsed on the mattress and I think I may have even
blacked out for a second or two. I had never come so hard in my life. I opened
my eyes as Starsky stretched out beside me and leaned his head against my
shoulder. “What about you?” I mumbled sleepily, barely able to keep my eyes
open.
“I’m okay.” Starsky said, taking my hand and guiding it
to his own softening cock to prove it. “I came when you did.”
“I need a nap. You wore me out.”
“Sounds like a good idea…we still got the whole night
ahead of us. I want you rested up for the main event.” Starsky said with a
chuckle, cuddling up against me as I drifted off to sleep with the memory of
his kisses burning on my lips.
When I opened my eyes, Starsky was still asleep, lying on
his stomach beside me with one arm thrown carelessly across my waist. I let my
hungry eyes sweep over that strong muscular back to the slender waist and the
firm globes of that perfect ass that he displayed so outrageously in those skin
tight jeans that he preferred. His legs were slightly parted and if I stretched
my neck I could see the heavy, lightly furred sack nestled between his thighs.
I let my right hand drift down to my groin, cupping my
own balls between my fingers and fondling them gently. I closed my eyes,
indulging in a little fantasy of my own. My eyes flew open guiltily when I
heard Starsky’s voice mumble, “Hey, did you decide to start the party without
me?”
He was awake, that crooked grin I loved on his handsome
face. His eyes were dancing with laughter as he watched me playing with myself.
“I was just admiring the view from this angle.” I admitted,
making a point of taking another long look at his gorgeous ass. I swear the man
was a walking advertisement for sex and he didn’t even realize it half the
time. Or maybe he did. I already knew he was an outrageous flirt. I knew it was
going to be an unforgettable experience getting to know this side of my partner
and best friend. And now my lover. The last lover I
would ever have or need. The only one I wanted for the rest of my life. Damn,
“Take your time. I don’t mind.” Starsky said, wiggling
that ass suggestively. I couldn’t resist reaching out and running the palm of
my hand over each rounded globe, letting my fingers linger for a moment in that
deep crack that separated them. I heard Starsky sigh softly as he pushed his
ass back against my hand, making my fingers slip in a little farther. “Go
ahead…” he whispered in a husky voice. “Play all your want. It feels good.”
“Starsky…have you ever…you know…” I stuttered, flushing
with embarrassment as I stumbled over my words. Those deep blue eyes focused on
my face and a slight smile tugged at his lips. Slowly, he shook his head.
“No…you’ll be the first.”
“The first?” I squeaked in
alarm. Until that moment I had just been asking a question but suddenly an
image of taking Starsky that way flashed into my mind and my cock went rock
hard in seconds. I wasn’t exactly a virgin in that respect. My ex-wife had
liked to take it up the ass now and then. I had enjoyed it the few times we had
done it that way but I still preferred it the more conventional way.
“Look, I’m not saying you have to do it if you don’t want
to. I’m just saying that I’d let you if you wanted to.” Starsky said, suddenly
sounding unsure of himself and a bit self-conscious.
“And believe me, you’re the only man I ever wanted to fuck me that way.”
“It’s not that. I just don’t want to hurt you.” I said,
suddenly realizing just how much Starsky loved me to offer to let me do that to
him. It would join us together in the most intimate way possible between two
men. I felt humbled and honored to be offered such a precious gift. A gift
freely offered with the purest of love. But I would sooner cut off my right arm
than hurt this man in any way.
“I trust you.” Starsky said with a faint attempt at a
smile. “I know it’s gonna hurt the first couple of times but I don’t care. I
want to show you just how much I love you.”
“Oh, babe…” I whispered, nuzzling the side of his neck
with my lips. “If I didn’t know before, I do now. Right now…I just want to
touch you and make you feel good. Okay?”
He nodded without answering and rolled over onto his
back. I covered his body with mine and kissed him deeply, rubbing my cock
against his groin his penis started to stand up and pay attention. We began
thrusting in unison, falling into a natural rhythm that just seemed to come
natural to both of us. Our cocks rubbed together deliciously, sending both of
us spiraling closer and closer to the edge with each thrust of our hips. We
screamed each other’s name as we came simultaneously, bathing each other with
our seed.
After catching my breath, I shoved myself to my feet and
reached down to grab my partner’s hand, pulling him up from the bed. “Come
on…we both need a shower. We smell like Miss Annie’s whorehouse after a busy
night.”
“How would you know?” Starsky giggled as he followed me
into the adjoining bathroom. “You were always too busy blushing to pay
attention to what was going on when we went in there.”
I swatted his ass playfully as I reached into the tub to
turn on the water and adjust it to a comfortable temperature. I pulled up the
knob to turn on the shower and we stepped into the tub with me standing
underneath the shower and Starsky standing in front of me, leaning back against
my chest. I leaned my head against his curls and let my hands drift over the
curly hair on his chest.
“God, Hutch…” he said with a chuckle “I didn’t know you
were going to be so insatiable. What are you trying to do? Put me in an early
grave?”
“Nope.” I whispered, nuzzling
his ear playfully. “I got other plans for you later. First we’re going to get
something to eat. I figure you must be starving by now.”
“Now that you mention it…” he said, grinning as his
stomach growled right on cue. We both laughed. I had learned a long time ago
that a well fed Starsky was a happy Starsky and I planned on doing whatever I
had to do to make this man happy for the rest of his life.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
The next evening, we arrived at Rachel’s for supper as
promised. The kitchen was filled with delicious aromas lingering in the air.
She greeted us both with a hug and a kiss, stroking the side of Starsky’s face
in a gentle caress. We sat down to eat, enjoying the meal tremendously. Rachel
had fixed Starsky’s favorite, the Paul Muni Special,
with plenty of carrots and potatoes. She joked about how that was the only way
she could ever get Starsky to eat his vegetables. I laughed and had to agree. I
was constantly telling Starsky that the vegetables on a pizza or in his
favorite burritos didn’t count.
Over slices of warm apple pie with a scoop of vanilla ice
cream on the top, Rachel leaned over to her eldest and said something to him in
Yiddish. Starsky’s face turned a bright red and he started to choke on the
piece of pie he had in his mouth. Alarmed, I slapped him on the back until he
caught his breath. Rachel merely smiled as she stood up to get us all some
coffee. I knew I would have to wait until later to find out just what she had
said to Starsky. He had taught me a few words in Yiddish but not enough to
translate what Rachel had said to him.
It was a pleasant evening but I was still glad when it
was over. I couldn’t wait to get Starsky alone back in our room at the motel. I
felt like a newlywed on my honeymoon and I knew that Starsky felt the same way.
Back in our room, after a long lingering kiss, I smiled at the curly haired
devil in my arms and said,
“Are you going to tell me what your mother said to you
that made you almost choke on your pie?”
“You sure you really wanna
know?” he asked evasively, trying to avoid the subject. I could tell it had
embarrassed him.
“She told me that she’s happy we finally got our heads
straight and figured out that we belonged together and that she wasn’t worried
about grandkids because we could always adopt.”
I couldn’t help laughing, especially when I saw the
exasperated expression on his face. “You’re kidding right?” I said between
bouts of laughter. “Your mom really said that? I guess your mom is still pretty
sharp after all.”
“She used to do that when I was a kid too.” Starsky
grumbled “I could never get away with anything because she always seemed to
know exactly what I was doing or thinking about doing.”
“You think she knows what we’ve were doing last night?” I
asked with a grin, enjoying teasing my friend.
“God, I hope not!” Starsky exclaimed looking genuinely
shocked at the idea.
“I know what I want to do right now.” I whispered
seductively, leaning up against him and rubbing my center against his.
“Yeah?” he said with a grin, grinding back against me.
“You plan on making an honest man out of me when we get back to
I knew that he was joking but I cradled my hand against
his cheek and said honestly, “I would in a minute if I could. I’d love to put a
ring on your finger so everybody would know that you belong to me now and that
they can’t touch you anymore.”
“I know…me too.” He said with a sweet little smile that
made my stomach do flip flops. “We’ll work it out, just like we always do. All
I want is to be with you.”
“Me and thee…forever.” I
whispered as I bent my head for a kiss.
We both knew we had some things to work out when we got
back home to accommodate the turn in our relationship. We’d have to keep both
apartments, at least temporarily, until we could figure out a way to move in
together without raising any suspicions in the department. Since we spent the
majority of our time together even when we were off duty and often spent the
night at one apartment or the other, it shouldn’t be that difficult to conceal
the fact that we were lovers. We both hated the idea of hiding our relationship
but we didn’t really have a choice.
“Hey, I called the Captain and he said we could take a couple
more days off before we have to be back at work.” Starsky said with a pleased
smile.
“That’s great. You must have caught him in a good mood.”
“Yeah, well, they’re going to start painting the squad
room next week and a lot of guys are taking vacation days while they do, so
he’s gonna be shorthanded for a few days.”
“So I guess we better make the most out of the time we
have left.” I said, pulling him towards the bed. I silently thanked whatever
power had sent Starsky to me and prayed that I would always make him as happy
as he made me. We had the rest of our lives to spend together and our entire
future ahead of us.
THE END